But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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