new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
