the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
ttyl tear gas
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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