On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
