love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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