haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
