UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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