Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
