you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
