do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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