He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
