I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
