Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
