you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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