You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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