Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Randomize
