Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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