I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
