This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
She even gives head with a lisp.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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