i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Randomize
