Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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