Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
