so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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