You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
