i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
