glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I need moral support for this bender
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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