It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
