you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
