I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
