Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
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