so that wasnt chicken after all
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
