I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
