she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
