White coat. Heels.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
