Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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