you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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