pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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