tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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