That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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