that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
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