you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
