How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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