you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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