I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
