I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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