why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Randomize
