i just wanna soil my oats bro
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
