I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
