dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize