he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Randomize
