I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
